Try Again

 

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As I began to write this , I initially felt silly. Not because I haven’t touched this blog in 3 (almost 4!)years , but because I feel like I talked a good game but not followed through in my LIFE goals. Looking back on my previous writings, I realize that years later I have been struggling with the some of same feelings for FAR too long: self- doubt and diffidence. NO MORE. In the last few months, I’ve decided to do some work on me. The real work. I’ve pinpointed the things that were holding me back and keeping me in a state of uncertainty especially when it comes to livelihood goals. I lost my job earlier this year and it felt like the final blow to my self esteem and self-worth. After a few months I realized that nothing is really final except death. I had to start showing gratitude (and stop the pity party!) and be thankful to my Creator everyday for so many things that were/are happening in my life. Loving parents and family. Good friends. A roof over my head. Food to eat. Relatively good health. The list goes on. I realized that like most people I am my greatest enemy…and my only competition. I realized that escapism through internet surfing , tv watching  and aimlessly walking around my city shopping had become my coping mechanism for not living the life I created in my head.

What is stopping me from fulfilling my real goals? Me. I’ve FINALLY decided to shove myself out of my own way and own and design my life exactly the way I want it. I’ve decided to stop letting people make decisions for me and be my own guiding light. I have nothing to lose. I’m a single 30 something making her way through life and trying to figure it all out without a manual.  I’ve decided to stop beating myself up over the bad decisions and mistakes. And the real tragedy there is not to learn from them! I have to quiet the negative voices in my head that say I am not good enough and remind myself of what is true….that I have limitless potential, smarts, intuition and natural talent. And so do you!

Read books, acquire skills, be kind, be BRAVE, stay humble but don’t take anyone’s mess either. I’m going to continue to share content in line with the original purpose on this blog  but also want to include my life goals and GROWTH on a bigger scale. I write this in hopes that someone sees themselves in my journey and that as long as you have breath in your body, it is NEVER too late to turn things around.

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